So stress is getting the best out of me

I started crying today during practice... and on top of that we just found out that the landlord wants to throw us out... yeah... I know... totally crazy...  as if I was not stressed out enough.... feeling GREAT!

Team Sweden - a weekend full of joy

We had the try-outs for Team Sweden this weekend, and it was amazing and fun, and amazing and even more fun. There were girls from almost every Swedish league participating, Gothenburg, Stockholm, Luleå, Umeå and Malmö, and they all looked great. You could tell that there were some girls that had much more coaching behind them, but there was also a lot of raw talent.

The try-out spanned over two days:
Saturday was mostly drills and a rulestest, to see where the girls skill level was at, and understanding of the rules. We also expected people to be in time and have all the things we had asked them to bring: Black and White shirt, pen for the rules-test, money for registration and of course all their derbygear... This was also the day that was required to come to... the floor in Häggvikshallen was just TERRIBLE it was soft and super sticky, and lots of  girls were struggling on it.

Sunday was a few drills, but mostly scrimmage, were we really got to see some girls in more of a game situation, and I even got to play a little. Sunday was not required, but it for sure helped us to see the track-awareness of girls and also really see how clean they could play.

Rollerderby in Sweden have gotten so far, and rollerderby is probably the most amazing thing in the world, there are so many amazing things that can be don when you decide to put your heart to it. I gave my heart to rollerderby a very long time ago, and I have never regretted it, even if there has been times when I have been more or less happy about it.

It has been lots of work leading up to the try-outs, but soon we will let the 16-17 know that made it in the first round, and we can start working towards greatness.

The time and effort derby acctually takes...

So people tell me ''I just want to play derby'' and I think that is what everyone wants. JUST TO PLAY DERBY... I love the thought and context of that simple line, I JUST WANT TO PLAY DERBY. Because that is EXACTLY what I want to do, I just want to play derby. But then you start to play derby, and you realize that there is so much more to it than just playing derby.
You need a place to play derby, you need referees to reff you, you need a track to play derby on and you need team-mates, you need to teach people to skate, you need someone to train the girls and you need a first-aid box filled with ice-packs, you need to learn how to hit saftley and you need parties for people to go to and you need someone that make sure that all your paperwork is in the right place so you can get those places to train at, you need money for rent and you need so much more than JUST TO PLAY DERBY.

This is where the burn-out comes in - becuase some people just settle for the ''I JUST WANNA PLAY DERBY'' and just play derby while everyone else work really hard around them, they think that practices plan themselves, they think that ice-bags appear out of thin air, that halls book themselves, and they really wonder why they have to even pay a member fee. This is not everyone, some people, including myself take on too much work, because I expect that things should be done, and I do them, and then instead of getting flowers I get complains that things are not done the way others wish them to be. All I expect is that people that aren't doing as much should be happy things get done... I don't belive that things are for free, I believe we get things done by hard work - together.... not alone...

I would love to just go out and skate an Monday night, but I'm holdinga practice, I would love to just gather and meet up with people on a random weeknight - but I'm doing league work or acctually squeezing in som time for my derbyshop SwedeVix... and trust me... leauge work is currently taking up more time than SwedeVix. I am really not complaining, I am just saying that I don't think that sometimes people realize how much some people in the leauge work for letting the rest of the league ''Just play derby''. It has been a really long time since I ''just played derby'' and I once again want to make a shoot out to all the amazing people at Jet City, Rat City and Gotham that allowed me to work for the leauge but also allowed me the time to JUST PLAY DERBY and made me into the skater I am today. Thanks to coaching by Carmen Getsome, Drew Blood, Juliett Bravo, Quadzilla, Bonnie Thunders, Kandy Kakes, Fisti Cuffs, Sweet Sherry Pie, Endless Justin, Buster Cheatin' and lots of other people, I am the skater I am today... and not only hte skaters that coached me but also the skaters I have skated with, who managed bout production, who took care of the leagues financials and all those other fun fun fun but time-consuming things!

And derby is the love of my life and I want it to go on and on and on and spread to everyone in the entire world! (I do also love Maloony)

Almost a year togethr in derby....

Things we do for the league....

On the 15th of June Crime City are doing a mini-demo for what roller-derby is in Malmö during something called Malmö Sommar Scen... so yesterday was the big media release day... and we got to show our cute little faces... in the rain and on the gravel... nothing is perfect I guess!  We got a picture and got mentioned in Sydsvenskan, that's the local newspaper for south of Sweden. Did I mention it rained?

Feeling the Blues

Sometimes things just get to you, you work hard and reach your goals and then goals are reached and you are trying so hard to figure out that next goal, that next step of your life.

I spend so much time on training others - that I sort of have lost track of what I want, what I strive for, and it makes me sad.

Announcing a bout

I think I have soon tried every aspect there is to derby, and in the Stockholm vs. Hamburg bout, I got to be an announcer with Loony. Stockholm asked me months ago - and I am quite honored that they asked me, good times it was. Of course we decided to announce on skates.... and it went quite well, except the fact that the music could not be on while announcing, so we ended up doing more dancing than announcing... but I think we got the important things covered!

SwedeVix first vendortable

Vix and Meme waiting for customers

Stockholm Rollerderby was amazing and let us have our first vendortable at their bout against Hamburg, so while me and Loony worked away as announcers Vix, Meme (that's the baby) and Mike sold people some nice wheels, socks and skates.... but we still have stuff left, visit us at www.swedevix.com

Stockholm vs. Hamburg - bouting time

Picture of STRD warming up stolen from Facebook

Stockholm arranged their first bout this weekend, and it was amazing and fun, me and Loony were announcers and Hamburg got beaten by Stockholm. Stockholm did start off a little shaky the first jams, until they ended up in a powerjam situation, and capitalized MAJORLY on it, and htey never looked back. Hamburg was never even close to catching up during the entire game. Hamburg only fielded 10 girls for the Stockholm trip and they started to look tired in the second period - I must make an extra shoot out to Heavy Miss Gale, who I think was in more than every second jam, and was by faaar the most effective Hamburg blocker, until she fouled out with a few minutes left on the clock.
Stockholm played tight and you could tell that they been working harder on some aspects of the game, such as bridging, stringing out the pack keeping the Hamburg jammer in play and hitting her over and over.
Stockholm really is one of my favorite teams, probably because I feel like I have always been a part of STRD and it made me so happy to see them skate so hard and smart. Ahhhh Stockholm - you guys are great.
Exactly a year ago on the day of the game was when I dragged HussInsane to her first Stockholm practice, and in this game she was for sure one of Stockholms most effective blockers, but also made a few successful attempts with the star on her helmoet, but not only that she was also wearing the captain C on the arm, and just frankly looked great. HyperNova looked as great as ever jamming, fluidly getting through the pack and Twisted T is really turning out to be quite a double-threat.  Stockholm has lots of talented and hardworking skaters, and that makes me happy and I am looking forward to see lots of them next weekend for Team Sweden try-outs.
Oh, and the final score was 150 - 55 to Stockholm....

This weekend in Stockholm!!

SwedeVix will be at RINK of FIRE and have our first vendor table... EXCITING! While me and Loony will be announcing the bout!! (it's Stockholm vs. Hamburg - and last time Hamburg beat Stockholm, so it's a re-match)

Next weekend we will go back to Stockholm for Team Sweden try-outs... and that will also be sooo exciting! Rollerderby is going places in Europe, and it makes me sooo happy, sooo happy... did I tell you guys it makes me HAPPY?

Working in the name of derby....

Haz wheelz - you wantz?

I love rollerderby to death, it is the most amazing thing I have ever gotten involved in and it has given me soo much, and I am giving back as much as I can, somedays I just feel so drained.... sooooo drained.... SwedeVix Skateshop takes time - but so does Crime City Rollers....

I used to just be just a skater, and then things have just added on, and I am amazingly happy to help as much as I can, but sometimes it get very draining, it is like swimming in mud (not that I ever tried, but I can imagine it is not very easy), I take one step forward, just to be shoved back two...

I still decided that it is ok, as long as I work hard and I see everyone around me work hard, I am fine with it,  I am even fine with being the hardest worker, I do like to work hard, keep my spinning head spinning, and I guess being a little dizzy at times makes life easier to deal with. (until you puke, ha ha ha) As long as things do go forward, and I get to skate more and more and more.....

We just picked the team that is going to Paris, and I'm thrilled, because it was so hard to pick, and decide who the alternates were going to be, since everyone are so hardworking and dedicated. Being a coach is not easy at all, but all things considered, it has made me a better person, derby has made me a better person... and the team is looking better and better.

....even if my dear girlfriend think I do take too much work on and that I spend too much time on meetings... but this weekend we are going to Stockholm together to be announcers at Stockholm Rollerderbys bout against Hamburg... ohhh... and the theme is cirkus... MOHAAHahahAHHAhahaha

Coching, slacking and skating

me and husse

It is interesting to coach in so many ways - there are the people that work so hard and never realize how amazing they are, since they always believe they can be better, and then there the ones that think that they are better than everyone else and therefore don't have to work hard, there are the ones that easily get distracted by personal issues and there are the ones that blame other people for not succeeding. I think I might have a little of everything in me, but I am mostly a person that see all the wrongs I do - and therefore never get to enjoy the moments I truly did really well, because I could have done better.
It annoys the hell out of me everytime I do something dumb on the track, go for a big hit and whiff or run into someones back - and that will be played in my head over and over for the next weeks... but I have to learn to also remember the great moments... we are almost always our worst enemies - if we let our personal stuff get in the way of our performance, if we belive that it is others that stand in out way of success or if it is plain lazyness... me myself is the onlyone that can surpass my own expectaions and I am also the only one that can truly give myself the pat on the shoulder.
It is probably a good thing that I didn't become a gymnast, because I probably would have killed myself in the hunt for a perfect score. And now I just strive to become a good coach, to make everyone work harder, overcome the little things and win together... and also have fun, fun, and fun together...
I have said this a thousand times, and will probably another thousand times

''Hard work will always win over talent, when talent don't work hard.''

Just imagine when talent is working hard, then the hard workers just will have to work even harder... I guess I'm an odd-duck, but hard work and sweat makes me happy, and it inspires me, and I think it is fun.

Haz sox... will skate

So we all know that rollerderby is all about the socks you wear.... I scrapped the fishnets a veeeery long time ago... but I cannot say anything but that I still love socks... kneehigh socks... I always wear different colored ones... Mmmmm... and the BEER socks are my favorite... Next bout I am going to wear one GAY and one yellow BEER sock... the rest... I don't know yet... but at least I got my socks figured out. I might even consider the purple unicorn ones... Ahhhhahhhhh... so many choices so few bouts!

Another day of coaching with Loony

Me trying to figure out the line-ups the past weekend...

Mondays we have 17.00 - 19.00 o'clock practices, and that is all good, those practices are open for everyone in our league - and we try to do lot's and lots of basic skills, working towards minimum skills for the girls that yet have not passed them, but also for everyone to really nail their basic skills, I belive that you can always get better.
There is nothing wrong with working on basics even when you have passed minimum skill, to be honest, it is called MINIMUM skills, and that means you have lots, and lots left to learn.
I like to run basic-skills practice with Maloony, I love to see when our girls crossovers get cleaner, faster and steadier. I love when our girls push themselves and get better than they ever thought they would.
It is so awesome to see that more and more of our girls are reaching the level where they can bout, and how they push themselves to be better and having fun in every stride...it is fun to sweat, and it is fun to push yourself...
But tomorrow we have the first travel-team practice, and I'm superduper excited about that... WHOAHAHAAa - we are going to Paris in exactly a month!

Swedens FIRST home-bout

Me and Banana Muggie, Banan Smärta and Banana Evil

We divided up everyone in Crime City into a purple and yellow team, non-permanent, but we wanted to give everyone the opportunity to play. And it went really well, the purple team beat the yellow team by 13 points, and they all seemed to be very happy SuperHeros and Bananas afterward!

Team Sweden try outs

We have announced Team Sweden try-outs... they will be held in Stockholm May 28th... Ahhhhh... I am soooo EXCIIITED!

Crime City hearts Looptroop

May 12th last year....
Sun and wearing black... maybe not the most reasonble outfits for the day, but I promise... we will look goood on film... and the music is AWESOME!

Shooting a music video

Me and Alotta on a short break

So Crime City got asked to help out in a music video for one of my long-time favorite bands, and today we shot from 8am until 8pm in under the blazing Swedish May sun... skating, skating and more skating... it will be aaaamazing... and it was quite an expericance and tremendously fun, fun FUN!!! I stole this picture from Alotta Riot, who is one of out awesome skaters, that has gotten soooo far in a very short time.
Oh, nad poor Loony got sooo sunburnt, I for sure got a little too much sun, but Loony really looks a litttle too red

Spending time in the grass and the sun in Brooklyn

Pancakes in the sun, Bunny aka Beatrix Slaughter made me and her cartoonish looking boyfriend amazing vegan pancakes and we layed out in the wild grown backyard of her house in Brooklyn. Then we walked over to Five Stride to say bye to Bonnie. And then I hurried back to the house to pack my things and get a car to JFK, so I could get back on my Sweden flight. It was with a heavy heart I left NYC, it is hard when you know you still have part of your dreams left behind, I want to go to Nationals again, and I know I could, I like working hard... and now I just have to dig in and make sure all of Europe makes it all into WFTDA and that my own skateshop blossoms, SwedeVix, check us out, and I love answering questions if you ahve any.

Getting a tattoo

Most of my tattooes are derby related, I've gotten them with friends from derby, yesterday me and OMG went and got out Subway token - a tattoo that is somewhat connected to being a Gotham Allstar.

Body...aches... in a good way

So I must admit, I am no longer used to rollerderby practice 3 days in a row.... it has been amazing fun, almost like a boot camp - but do my body feel a little mangled now... just a liiiitle... ugh...
Well,  and after the 3 hour long Gotham Allstar practice yesterday, me Lynx, Bonnie and OMG dressed in matching Five Stride t-shirts and went to the adult rollerdisco in New Jersey... Ooooh yeah... wooop wooop... I almost went skating without toestops and with jampluggs - and then I came to my senses and did not... ha ha ha ha

This morning - this girl is just EXHAUSTED!

The personal challange and derby

Me and Twisted from Stockholm

We all have different challenges when it comes playing derby, and it is lots and lots about yourself and what you wanna make derby to be for you! We all have personal goals and personal agendas, and we all face struggles. My largest struggle right now is that I just can't skate as much derby as I want.

I am currently in NYC, and it is just amazing to be back, and play derby the way I really enjoy playing derby. I LOVE this sport - it is hard work, tremendously hard work, but it is so satisfactory when it all works out. 

Don't get me wrong, I love coaching, I really do, I work really hard to figure out the best ways to teach people, to have girls up their skating and derby level, and I ADORE when I see girls progress. It makes ever hour I spend coaching worth it. Because I want everyone to share my passion, but I do  understand that everyone are not as passionate or driven. I still think that the ground rule is that if you wanna play roller derby, you will have to work for it, because everyone around you is working so hard for you. Coaching is not easy, not at all... I don't think I ever realized when I was in Rat City how hard of a job Carmen Getsome and all the other RCRG coaches had, and how great Gothams coaching committe was... not until now... coaching and keeping a large and very diverse group motivated and working hard is ... hard (so everyone give your coaches an extra pat on the shoulder next time you see them)

I have always belived in hard work, so I work hard, and then I expect everyone else to work hard. Roller derby is amazing, it's the most fun I can ever ask for, it makes my feet and ear tingle. Everyone have a different way of taking on challenges, but working hard usually gives results, and it might be a longer journey for some, that does not make them any less amazing, but it will just take longer, but I still want everyone to work hard. Practice time is practice time, play time is playtime, and we do that outside practice... I have noticed that the hardest practices are the practices that people come up to me afterwards telling me that they had an amazing time....

I think rollerderby is amazing fun, when I started skating, I worked soooo hard to get to the level where I'd be allowed to participate in scrimmages, and it paid off, because there is nothing that is as fun as to play rollerderby. Sure, there are lots and lots of things around rollerderby that might be fun, but the core is the game, the thits, the jam, the adrenalin, the smiles from your team mates and that team play out on the track. I really don't care about the rest, I just wanna PLAY ROLLERDERBY!

When it comes down to it all, JUST play rollerderby, it is the best fun you can have... and it also keeps you in shape and make you wake up with a smile every morning. But to play derby you have to work for it, it just don't come for free... nothing in life is for free... (yeah I took economics in collage)

Sorry, this was sort of a rant... but I love derby so much, but I also realize that it is hard work, and it is not all about walking around looking good in fish-nets. I walk around and look good because I play derby, and I think fish-net burns are stupid... why would you want a burn that you can avoid... (and if you wanna wear fishnets, wear skin colored dance tights under, in that way you will not get the fish-net burn, he he he)

Same, same but different...

Crashpad - the Gotham Lair

I got to scrimmage with Manhattan, Bronx and the Allstars... I am totally dead... watching TV and drinking a beer, Bonnie is falling asleep sitting on the couch and I am really EXHAUSTED but me and OMG are keeping it together - drinking a beer each...  It is just crazy fun to be back and skate, skate, skate... I even JAMMED! How about that!? Oh, so much fun, don't tell anyone, but jamming was fun!

IN NYC - skating away

I'm in NYC visiting my Gotham Girls and getting my skate on, might not be the entire reason why I am here, but it's the reason that makes me happy. Well, well... what can I say. Yesterday I got my skate on with my old team, the Manhattan Mayhem.... That was awesome!! And then I spent some time at Five Stride, and that was a good time too, it always is a good time to see OMG!

I am a very talented bench-coach

Call me Bench Manager Swede